Building Truly Neuroaffirming Practice: A Guide for Providers

Beyond Buzzwords: What Neuroaffirming Practice Actually Requires

Hi fellow human who wants to offer genuinely neuroaffirming support 👋- welcome! I'm so glad you're here😍. First things first, I need you to understand that being truly neuroaffirming requires more than updating your website copy or attending a one-day workshop.

It requires ongoing self-reflection, challenging deeply held beliefs about normalcy, and fundamentally shifting how you view neurodivergence - are you willing to do the work?
Yes? Great! Let’s dive in 🎉

The Inner Work Required

True neuroaffirming practice starts with examining your own unconscious biases about what constitutes "appropriate" behaviour, communication, or function. This means asking ourselves some potentially uncomfortable questions:

• Why do I believe certain behaviours need to be changed?

• What assumptions am I making about what's "best" for this person?

• Am I trying to help them fit into systems, or am I willing to challenge systems that don't accommodate them?

Practical Steps to Neuroaffirming Practice

Environmental Modifications

Creating a safe place starts with believing that we all have sensory needs in order to regulate ourselves. Creating spaces that offer sensory choice rather than sensory control becomes the expression of this. This doesn't mean accommodating every possible sensory need (impossible), but providing options people can modify to meet their requirements.

Consider these elements:

• Lighting options (overhead, lamps, natural light)

• Seating varieties (chairs, floor cushions, standing options, movement seats)

• Sound management (quiet spaces, background noise options, noise-cancelling tools)

• Tactile choices (fidget tools, different textures, comfort items)

Remember: The goal isn't creating a "sensory room" - it's building flexibility into your standard practice environment, and not ‘assuming’ we know best.

All behaviour is communication

I’m sure you’ve heard this one before. It means asking ourselves not only why do I believe this behaviour needs be changed, but what is driving it.

This means:

• consider their neurology when looking at someone’s actions?

• what social assumptions am I making when determining what is or is not appropriate?

• is this behaviour harmful or a safety concern? if not, does it actually need to change?

• could this be a reflection of an unmet need? is it sensory, connection, autonomy or safety that is driving this?

Communication Approaches

Recognise that neurodivergent communication isn't inferior - it's different. Your role is learning to communicate effectively across neurotypes, not teaching neurodivergent people to communicate like neurotypicals.

This means:

• Accepting direct communication as efficient, not rude

• Understanding that eye contact can be painful or impossible for some people

• Recognising that processing time varies

• Allowing multiple communication methods (verbal, written, visual, movement)

Remember: this doesn’t mean we are saying Neurodivergent people can do whatever they like, its instead offering education on different communication styles so the neurodivergent person doesn’t internalise a communication breakdown, but instead see’s it as a miscommunication.

Goal Setting and Planning

Shift from compliance-based to collaboration-based approaches. Instead of setting goals about what someone should do differently, work together to identify what environmental changes would support their success.

Ask these questions:

• What does success look like to you?

• What environments help you function best?

• What barriers are you currently experiencing?

• How can we modify systems to better support your neurotype?

Remember: keep in mind some of the earlier questions around what assumptions I am making about what someone may want, and separate your personal values and beliefs from those of the person you are supporting.

Recognising Masking and Its Impacts

Many neurodivergent people become skilled at masking - appearing more neurotypical than they actually are. Providers must understand that:

• Masking is exhausting and unsustainable

• Someone who masks well still needs support

• The goal isn't better masking - it's reducing the need to mask

• Many high masking late identified people do not know how to unmask at first

• Burnout often follows periods of intensive masking

Your role: Create environments where people can be authentic rather than environments that reward masking.

Unmasking takes time - you need to provide safety, consistently to let your clients know, that its okay to be unmasked around you.

Understanding Fluctuating Capacity

Neurodivergent people experience genuine fluctuations in capacity based on stress, sensory environment, sleep, energy levels and so much more. This isn't inconsistency or lack of motivation - it's how neurodivergent nervous systems function.

Neuroaffirming responses:

• Plan for capacity variations in service delivery

• Develop flexible goals that accommodate daily differences

• Recognise that needing support some days and not others is normal

• Avoid interpreting capacity fluctuations as manipulation or attention-seeking

Remember: Check your assumptions

The Language of Affirmation

Your language reveals your underlying beliefs. Neuroaffirming providers:

• Use identity-first language (when preferred by individuals)

• Describe differences rather than deficits

• Focus on environmental/societal barriers rather than individual limitations

• Acknowledge strengths that come with neurodivergent neurotypes

Example reframes:

• "Communication differences" instead of "communication problems"

• "Sensory processing needs" instead of "sensory issues"

• "Different learning style" instead of "learning difficulties"

Building Cultural Competence

Just as identity first language reflects that being neurodivergent is not a ‘diagnosis’ but a part of someone’s identity; this come with culture. Neurodivergent culture has its own communication styles, environmental preferences, shared lived experiences and requires providers to learn cultural competence within neurodivergent communities. Examples of this may mean:

• Understanding that stimming serves important functions

• Recognising special interests as sources of joy and expertise

• Appreciating different social communication styles e.g. info-dumping or penguin pebbling

• Respecting autonomy and self-determination

Remember: Different not less.

Ongoing Education and Growth

Genuinely neuroaffirming practice requires commitment to ongoing learning:

• Listen to neurodivergent voices and lived experiences

• Challenge your assumptions regularly

• Seek feedback from the people you support

• Join neurodivergent-led training and education opportunities

• Acknowledge when you make mistakes and commit to doing better

The Question That Changes Everything

When you encounter something that seems challenging or different, ask yourself: "Why does it need to be this way? Is there a way we can support this rather than changing them?"

This single question can transform your practice from one that seeks compliance to one that truly affirms neurological diversity.

Remember: It's a Journey

The understanding and practice of what ‘being neuroaffirming’ is dynamic and ever-evolving. It’s why among other providers I find so many of us questioning if we are truly neuroaffirming as continue to learn more. (look up the dunning-kruger effect - are we every truly done learning?)
Becoming genuinely neuroaffirming isn't a destination - it's an ongoing journey of learning, reflecting, and growing.The neurodivergent community needs providers willing to do this work authentically, not just those who can say the right words.

Your commitment to being affirming is life-changing for the people you support.